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    Mindfulness of Dating

    SF
    Sean FargoPublished January 12, 2015 · Updated October 22, 2026 · 1 min read

    Printable Worksheet

    Mindfulness of Dating

    PDF·161 KB

    A mindful companion to this worksheet

    Bringing mindfulness to mindfulness of dating

    Relationships keep changing, and they ask things of us we did not expect. “Mindfulness of Dating” invites you to notice the patterns you bring into connection, and which of them you would like to soften or strengthen.

    How mindfulness can help

    Mindfulness lets us notice our own reactions as they happen: the tightening in the chest, the story forming in the mind, the pull to defend or pull away. From that noticing, we have a little more room to choose a response instead of a reflex, and to offer the people we love a steadier presence.

    Gentle steps to try

    1. Settle in the body. Before a hard conversation, you might rest a hand on your chest or belly and feel three breaths move under your palm.
    2. Notice your story. Catch the story you are telling yourself about the other person. Is this something you know, or an interpretation?
    3. Offer one moment of attention. Look at someone you love today as if you were meeting them for the first time. Notice what changes.
    4. Honor the boundary. Caring for the relationship and caring for yourself are not opposites. A boundary spoken kindly can deepen connection.

    Every relationship has seasons of closeness and seasons of strain. Meeting both with curiosity rather than a verdict keeps the door open.

    A note from Sean

    Try this today. Write a short list of people you know locally who might know someone eligible for you to meet. Then reach out to one of them and ask directly if they would set you up. That is the worksheet’s first step, and it is enough for a day. Before you send the message, notice your chest and belly. Write down what you feel, and what you tell yourself about asking.

    Keep going: How to Practice Mindfulness In Relationships and A Compassion Meditation for Emotions.

    This suits anyone who wants to date with more attention, including after a breakup. Dating can stir up loneliness, rejection, or grief. If it does, go gently. Stop when you need to.

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