Someone once asked me whether I'm actually meditating while I guide, or just talking. The short answer is yes. I'm doing the practice with you, and at the same time I'm feeling for what might be useful next and a crisp, kind way to phrase it. That's typically how I lead all of them.
I was a monk for two years. Most of what I do now is help other people lead meditations. So here are a few things that may be helpful.
How to lead a guided meditation, step by step
- Settle yourself first
- Start with the ground
- Tell people what to expect
- Have a starting place, not a whole route
- Use a script as a framework
- Speak in your own voice
- Leave more silence than feels comfortable
- Ease your voice back in
- Stay with what comes up, including your own nerves
- Wait afterward, and know where to point people
The ten steps, in a little more detail
1. Settle yourself first. A big part of my own process was finding my voice. How do I sound when I'm feeling connected, embodied, grounded, caring? So I still take a minute before guiding to find that. Okay, let's find me. Can I connect with my care for the people here? Not forcing myself to be a calm teacher, just noticing how I actually feel and speaking from there. The same minute helps before you press record.
2. Start with the ground. Nine times out of ten I begin the same way. Feet on the floor. The weight of the body on the seat. A sense of gravity. From there I'll sense into different parts of the body, bring in the breath, segue into wishing ourselves and then each other well, and ground again at the end. That's four or five practices blended into one.
3. Tell people what to expect. Mention that the eyes can stay open or close, and that it's fine to shift or stop. I'll usually add that if something feels very unsafe, they can back off and find a safe place in the body. Beginners tend to want a little more guidance than silence, since distraction tends to be rampant.
4. Have a starting place, not a whole route. When I started one of our community calls I had no idea what the meditation was going to be. I never do, even on retreats. I had a starting place and the people, and thirty percent in I still didn't know what came next. If you're newer, a script gives you the starting place, and I'd hold the rest loosely.
5. Use a script as a framework. Our [free guided meditation scripts](https://mindfulnessexercises.com/free-guided-meditation-scripts/) are there for this, and if you'd rather write your own, there's a [guide to writing a meditation script](https://mindfulnessexercises.com/how-to-write-a-meditation-script/). The Buddha, not to get too Buddhisty here, told people to teach this in their own language rather than copying his. I think that's good advice for a script too. My preference is that people don't read them word for word, because usually people can tell.
6. Speak in your own voice. There's a songwriting line that all you need for a good song is three chords and the truth. I don't know who started it. A guided meditation is similar: your feet on the ground, your heart open to the people you're helping, and something sincere. That might be oversimplifying it. We don't have to be someone we're not. The last thing I want is a hundred Sean Fargos. I mean, the world only wants one.
7. Leave more silence than feels comfortable. As new teachers, I think the tendency is to fill the space with words. I'm guilty of it myself. But if we're inviting people to notice, to open, they need that space, and we can't do it for them. My favorite teachers are very comfortable in silence, to the point that they're not so popular. When in doubt, stay silent.
8. Ease your voice back in. After a minute or more of silence, ease your voice back into the space rather than announcing "And now we're going to sense into the feet." That can be abrasive. Same with "Now I want you to." It isn't quite in the spirit of practicing together. So, a softer cadence. A caring voice. I keep something warm to drink nearby for the vocal cords.
9. Stay with what comes up, including your own nerves. If I'm a little afraid no one will say anything, that's my practice, and I'll be with that. Sometimes I notice I'm leaning forward into my own guidance, and I'll physically shift back a little and let the pause run longer. If you guide long enough, tears will come up for someone. The common response is just love. Looking at them with kind eyes, maybe asking if this is too intense.
10. Wait afterward, and know where to point people. Widen the berth of silence. Some teachers pause five seconds and move on. If no one shares, that's fine. And have a plan for the person who needs more than you can offer: a therapist, a teacher you trust, or for the rare difficult experience that doesn't settle, [Cheetah House](https://www.cheetahhouse.org/meditator-consultations-1).
Guiding a meditation vs. teaching meditation
A lot of people reading this don't want to become meditation teachers. A yoga teacher closing class with five quiet minutes, or a manager opening a meeting with a minute of breathing. All we're doing is inviting other people to notice what's going on for them right now. What's here? No gymnastics required.
Teaching asks a little more of you. Helping people practice when you're not in the room, usually by sending them home with something small and daily, and knowing when a question is above your pay grade. Mindfulness teaching can be quite simple. Not always easy, but it is pretty simple.
How can I learn to lead guided meditations?
A lot of this you can learn for free. Listen to a lot of guided meditations and notice how different teachers pace them. Our [audio library](https://mindfulnessexercises.com/audio-library/) is a place to start, and anything from Tara Brach, Jack Kornfield or Sharon Salzberg counts. Our [free online courses](https://mindfulnessexercises.com/free-online-mindfulness-courses/) are for your own practice. When I first started teaching, the most helpful exercise for me was recording audio of myself trying to teach, ten times, and forcing myself to listen until it came out okay. Then listen back the way a student would. Did I give people enough space to settle? Was my pace a little too fast?
For whatever it's worth, the Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Certification asks for the same things: your own practice, a course on how to guide meditations, and a recording of yourself guiding one. That's there if you want it. The free library above covers most of this.
Common challenges when leading guided meditations
Nervousness. When I first started teaching, waiting ten seconds after a meditation felt like an eternity, and whoever raised a hand first, I wanted to bow to them and say thank you for saving me. Now I'll wait it out, and someone usually speaks within thirty seconds.
Wanting everyone to like it. There's no secret sauce. Some people love long pauses, some don't. I can guarantee that in any room, some people didn't like parts of the meditation and others loved it.
Feeling like a fraud. I had the imposter syndrome too. The [how to teach meditation](https://mindfulnessexercises.com/how-to-teach-meditation/) page has the Jack Kornfield story about that doubt. Some caution here is a kind of respect for the people you want to help.
Before your first one
When I guide, people aren't there because of me. No offense to me, but they're not. They're there for some support in being with their own experience, and that's the same thing you'll be offering, with your feet on the floor and a few sincere words. May we all find our own voice in sharing this, with compassion and generosity and courage.