Forgiveness Meditation: Let Go of Resentment and Embrace Love

Forgiveness Meditations. Think back to a time when you first held a newborn baby. Maybe it was your own baby. Maybe you just gave birth. All messy and painful. Or maybe you just watched someone give birth. Maybe you were grossed out. Or maybe you first held a baby belonging to a relative who you don't like very much. Remember when you first saw the baby? So cute and vulnerable. Remember the first time you held it in your arms. Remember its need for protection, its cute little eyes, soft skin. Maybe it threw up on you. Maybe it smiled. But remember the affection that you had for this baby. The love that you had that you shared with this little person. Feel your heart open to this little baby. This cute, cuddly being new to this world. Remember the unconditional love that you had for this baby. Even if it threw up on you or didn't like you very much. You still loved it unconditionally. Now remember that you were once a little baby, just like this one. Maybe you were cuter. Maybe not so much. But you were a little person, worthy of love and affection. Because you're listening to this means you've survived little babyhood. People cared for you. People loved you unconditionally. Even if you're a little brat or a goody tushu, people loved you just the same. You're worthy of love. People embraced you, fed you, cleaned up your crap, introduce you to the world the best that they could. Connect with this love. Breathing in, I feel unconditionally loved. Breathing out, I remain connected to this feeling of being loved. Breathing in, I feel unconditionally loved. Breathing out, I remain connected to this feeling of being loved. What does that feel like in your heart? In your body. Now think back to a time when you've hurt someone. Maybe you harm someone physically or emotionally or both. Say their name out loud three times. Picture yourself standing opposite this person, saying, Feeling profound sorrow for the harm I cause you. I express my remorse for all the ways my actions have hurt you. I'm sorry for not being considerate of your feelings. If I hurt you physically, I hope it didn't hurt too much. I hope that you don't have a big bruise or broken bones, scars that are not worth showing to your girlfriend or boyfriend. Any large wounds people may or may not have poured salt on. If I hurt you emotionally, I'm sorry. Whether you're overly sensitive or not doesn't really matter. But if I hurt you, it was only because I lost touch with who I was in that moment, which is a loving person who only wants the best for you. Please, I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive me. As I feel the pain of any pain that I caused you. Hurt me much more than it hurt you, probably. I'm guessing. But I do feel pain. I apologize for the pain inflicted on you. My deepest wish is for your healing. I ask for your forgiveness, knowing that you may not forgive me now. But I hope that you may forgive me at some point. Should you not be ready to forgive me now, I meet that with patience and respect. I'm sorry. Now imagine someone who has seriously hurt you, either physically, emotionally, or both. Maybe it's a childhood friend who betrayed you by stealing your checkers when you weren't looking. Maybe it was your mom or dad who would never buy you enough Taco Bell for dinner or get you what you wanted. Maybe it was a teacher who slapped your wrist with a ruler or graded your papers too harshly. Maybe it's a former lover or spouse who may have cheated on you with their co-workers. Picture this person who has hurt you and say their name out loud three times. Remember to breathe. Now imagine standing opposite this person, making eye contact. Feel their presence. Look into their eyes. And imagine yourself saying to this person, I'm learning to recognize that hurt people hurt people. What you did to me hurt me in a very deep way, and I need you to know that. In offering my forgiveness to you, I don't condone or agree with what you did to me. I am choosing to let go of remaining attached to experiencing this pain because I recognize it does not serve anybody for me to hold on to it. I forgive you for what you've done to me. I forgive you for what you've done to me. I forgive you. It's more important that your forgiveness be genuine than doing this because you believe you should be doing this. If you're not quite ready to forgive, you can offer the simple intention, may I be willing to forgive you when I am ready. May I learn to become ready to forgive you someday. Last but not least is perhaps the hardest person to forgive yourself. But first reconnect with the feeling that you are that lovable child, that small infant that you once were. Maybe it felt like a long time ago. You probably don't remember. Your brain probably wasn't very big to soak in the experience in a sane, logical way. But imagine yourself being a small little infant, helpless, lovable, a cute, cuddly being new to this world. Who knows where you were before that? But reconnect with how lovable you were and still are. And now picture all of the times that you abandoned yourself throughout your life. Maybe you were self-destructive. Maybe in your college years, maybe you drank way too much and passed out on the sidewalk while other people walked by and urinated on you. Maybe you forgot who you really were sometimes. Picture the things you feel ashamed of having done that hurt others, or the times you are not patient with yourself, and take a deep breath. If you're like me, there are many ways that you fail to respect yourself or take care of yourself, your body, and your mind. Sometimes you may not have always honored the spirit inside of you. But reconnect with the feeling of being loved, being lovable, and feel the unconditional love for the being who you really are, and say, I forgive myself. I forgive myself. I forgive myself. If you're not quite ready to fully forgive yourself, that's okay. You can offer the intention, I'm willing to learn how to forgive myself when I am ready. Perhaps I did the best I could, given the circumstances I was in, and given the tools and resources that were available to me at that time. Looking at it that way, I understand. Even though I don't agree with how I acted, I forgive myself for forgetting who I truly am. I am letting that person and that time go. I forgive myself. I am now dedicated to learning how to stay in touch with my true nature as a loving person.