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    On Identity, Gratitude, and the Gift of an Orange

    SF
    Sean FargoPublished October 16, 2025 · Updated October 21, 2026 · 3 min read

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    The I's of Your Identity

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    A mindful companion to this worksheet

    Living closer to what matters

    Values are the quiet compass under the noise of daily life. “The I's of Your Identity” asks you to listen for what you most want your life to express, and to notice where your hours and your values have drifted apart.

    How mindfulness can help

    Mindfulness makes room for the stillness in which values become easier to hear. When the distraction settles, the deeper preferences of the heart get a word in. Practice helps us not only know our values but live closer to them.

    Gentle steps to try

    1. Take the long view. Picture yourself ten years from now looking back on this season. What would you hope was true about how you spent it?
    2. Choose three words. Pick three words for what you most want to embody. Write them somewhere you will see them daily.
    3. Check one choice. Look at one decision in front of you this week. Which option moves you toward your three words?
    4. Forgive the gap. Notice the gap between values and behavior with curiosity, not judgment. The noticing is the practice.

    A meaningful life is built one small alignment at a time. The point is not to live your values perfectly, but to keep returning to them.

    Grateful for Waking Up App by Sam Harris, whose teachings and guided meditations help me live with greater clarity, peace, and awareness. At the time of this post (October 2025), they had provided 50 free three-month subscriptions to our Mindfulness Exercises community.

    Waking Up is one of my favorite apps, offering insights and practical practices that support a deeper understanding of who we truly are. Whether you’re new to mindfulness or seeking to go deeper, it’s a valuable resource for exploring presence, cultivating calm, and connecting more fully with yourself and life. I highly recommend it.

    What I’m Contemplating: The Many Versions of You

    I came across a reflection that has stayed with me:

    You are a different person to everyone you meet. To some, you’re quiet. To others, you never stop talking. Some remember you for your kindness, others for the time you walked away. You are a villain in someone’s story, a hero in another’s. And to most, you’re just a passing thought.

    The truth is, you don’t exist as one person, but as countless versions of yourself, shaped by fleeting moments and personal perceptions. You will never hear your own laughter the way someone else does. You will never see the way your absence lingers in a room you once filled.

    To yourself, you are just you. But to others, you are a thousand different stories, none of which you will ever get to read.

    This isn’t a call for anxiety, but for humility and grace. It reminds me that my story is not the only one, and that everyone is the main character of their own complex narrative.

    What I’m Looking Forward To: Workshops & Retreats (Autumn 2025)

    These were the live virtual events in our community in autumn 2025. Everyone was welcome to join for practice and community; the community feed lists what is on now.

    Meditation Retreat with Sean Fargo – Oct. 10th

    Writing & Meditation Workshop – Oct. 19th

    Mindfulness of Thoughts – Oct. 30th

    Planning a Personal Meditation Retreat – Nov. 6th

    Inner Sanctuary: A Mini Retreat for Uncertain Times – Nov. 15th

    The Heart of Mindfulness: Loving-Kindness – Dec. 4th

    How to Create, Market, and Run a Retreat – Dec. 17th

    What I’m Practicing: Receiving Life as a Gift

    My current practice is to feel life as a valuable gift I didn’t create or earn.

    When I remember this, even the smallest things become precious: the clean water from the faucet, the sound of my daughter’s laughter, the way the morning light shifts across the room.

    From this place, I try to open my senses and my heart more fully to what’s already here. It’s a gentle reminder that life isn’t just something to rush through or control, but something to receive, moment by moment, with gratitude and wonder.

    A Poem I Love: “The Orange” by Wendy Cope

    This poem captures finding peace in ordinary moments.

    The Orange

    At lunchtime I bought a huge orange
    The size of it made us all laugh.
    I peeled it and shared it with Robert and Dave
    They got quarters and I had a half.
    And that orange, it made me so happy,
    As ordinary things often do
    Just lately. The shopping. A walk in the park.
    This is peace and contentment. It’s new.
    The rest of the day was quite easy.
    I did all the jobs on my list
    And enjoyed them and had some time over.
    I love you. I’m glad I exist.

    — Wendy Cope

    May your week be filled with moments that make you glad you exist.

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