I get asked this question of geez, I haven’t meditated. How do I get started? And it’s hard for many people because what many of us don’t appreciate is that – and I use the term in my book, a DJ, but it’s this internal dialogue and it is a dialogue that isn’t necessarily who you really are at all. It is a collection of events, experiences, commentaries from your environment that oftentimes you allow to define you. And not necessarily in a positive way. And as a result you have an emotional response when you’re listening to these voices or this dialogue or the DJ if you will. And the first thing that I recommend people do and certainly as one of the bases or the legs of doing mindfulness or meditation is to simply breathe in and out and be attuned to that. And as you get distracted if it’s really distracting actually consciously think about the air going through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. And the very nature of that type of concentration distracts you from the dialogue. And once you’ve mastered that and you pay attention to the fact that oftentimes your muscles are very tense because again you’re carrying your emotions. And with intention go through actually and say I’m relaxing the muscles in my feet, my legs, my chest, my abdomen and so forth.
And sort of go through this process with intention doing each one of these things and with intention also distractions you from listening to that voice. And once you’ve done that for a period of time then you suddenly realize the very nature of that action, the consistency of that, you’re no longer having that same emotional response or you’re not starting to listen to that dialogue. And that starts releasing you. And then the next step as you learn these techniques, the wonderful thing is you can actually changed the dialogue. And change it to one where it is a supportive dialogue. One of the greatest challenges of people in the West is they have this negative internal dialogue and it’s the nature unfortunately of our society. In Eastern cultures actually it’s interesting. It doesn’t really exist. And so when you if you will stop the DJ and then change the dialogue to one that is nurturing, supportive of yourself the most wonderful thing that happens is your physiology changes and then the manner in which you react or interact with other people becomes completely different. And having been through this myself and seen this and taught this it’s really quite extraordinary the possibilities. Because when you take the time to do that breathing, when you take the time if you will to tame the mind, when you take the time to open your heart and recognize that not only are you suffering but that everyone in some way or other has burdens. All of those steps then allow you to be much more thoughtful, kind and interested because then you recognize that the other person is just like you.And when you recognize that key aspect then what you do to others you’re doing to yourself. And if you treat yourself with kindness, compassion, love it’s so much easier then to give that gift to other people. And it changes not only that other person, it changes the entire environment around you.
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Sean Fargo is the Founder of Mindfulness Exercises, a former Buddhist monk of 2 years, a trainer for the mindfulness program born at Google, an Integral Coach from New Ventures West, and an international mindfulness teacher trainer. He can be reached at Sean@MindfulnessExercises.com
Mindfulness Of Your Blind Spots
Morning Affirmations To Condition Your Mind for The Best Day Ever
Morning Affirmations To Start Your Day On The Right Foot (Daily Affirmations)
Positive Thinking Affirmations
Self-Discipline Through Mindfulness – How To Become More Disciplined
Love Yourself (Self Confidence Exercise)
Mini Meditations To Let Go of Stress
Headspace Meditation: Getting Started
“The Hole in the Road”
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